So I find out that my former best friend is pregnant.

 

What the hell do I do? Tell her I'm sorry? Because I KNOW what she'll go through. She's only a little slip of a girl, anyway. I want to apologize... but there's nothing for me to apologize for. I'm tired of her always getting the men... ALWAYS... and flirting even when she already has a boyfriend that loves her more than anything. I just wish we could put everything behind us. I don't care if she apologizes anymore or not. Just so long as she doesn't decide that digging into the past and bringing up the same bullshit is worth it. If she starts another fight, I'll finish it.

 

I'm tired... Tired of being alone... of having so few friends.... of being exhausted and working all the time. I just want someone to cuddle up with at night, watch a movie, maybe... an just be a lech with. Someone I can 'use' as much as they use me... Though my version of the words is certainly less threatening than with some women. I want movies.. dates... where the men pay for it all.. I've NEVER had that.. I always end up using osme of my money... or all of it. It sucks.

 

Now I got myself all mad again...